What’s eating…?

 

My 5 am Rhodies

  …Us?  Trogoautoegocrat. 

I’m resentful too. Lord help me manage better I pray IJN

What can I say?

This year’s peonies. Will I see next year’s?

I’m really tired and disconnected. Jessi’s help me find my being. Keep me working. Make me kind. I am grateful. Such a beautiful world. Thinking of Monty and father often.   Help me run the race competently. IJN

Medical complaints

 

Photo by I on walk home today

I’ve been complaining about my cardiologist’s poor  bedside manner, with the caveat that I hope he’s a good diagnostician anyway. I got a phone call from one of his PA’s saying he wanted me to have iron infusions, suspecting a problem with my TSH although it looked to me like the number was in the right range and I can’t diagnose  I checked it out online and it means thyroid stimulating hormone test so although they didn’t say so they may suspect hyperthyroidism and I’m willing to try the iron infusions that they will prescribe though hopefully not iron pills. 

  Thank you Lord for good medical care in this country and era. 

voluntary, voluptas, delight and will (voluntas),

 

Rain on windshield this am

Begin this rainy medical laden day. We shall see what it brings

Brought a meeting with the codfish doctor. Meaning he has a personality in bedside manner of that animal and that you mentioned it to his receptionist who said he’s not very friendly I can change if I want to, but I said no the rest of the staff is good and I only see him every five years anyway. I just hope he’s a good diagnostic to make up for his affect.  Profunct and insincere personified. Reminds me of that dumb athletic stripper forty years ago who’s dance routine consisted of running around the room in his G string and plucking dollars out of the women’s hands without actually dancing. 

God’s will, tender mercies

 

Grandma by I, 6-8-26

I suppose the tender mercies stand in obvious contrast to the suffering of our days. So we must say thank you for both, I’m told:

I think that the overarching point of this sermon is that everything that ever took place or takes place or will take place is part of God’s will. This means that even the awful and evil things that befall this planet and mankind in its affairs are God’s will. This is not reassuring for most of us, and yet it does indicate that God has inscrutable purposes in everything that happens, which we will never see or understand clearly, being the tiny creatures that we are. And so, standing on the shores, the apparently desolate shores of this vast sea of grief and anguish that we face, being alive on a planet where life is, for most of us in one way or another, quite difficult. How does Meister Eckhart see this question? Well, Sermon 10 is brief, …

“ What does he mean by saying Moses besought the Lord his God? Truly, if God is your Lord, then you must be his servant. And if you then work for your own good or your own pleasure or your own salvation, then indeed you are not his servant, for you seek not only God’s glory but your own profit. Why does he say, the Lord his God? If God wills you to be sick and you want to be well, if God wills that your friend should die and you want him to live contrary to God’s will, then God is not your Lord. If you love God and are sick in God’s name, if your friend dies in God’s name, if he loses an eye in God’s name, with such a man it would indeed be well. But if you are sick and pray to God for health, then health is dearer to you than God, and he is not your God. He is the God of heaven and earth, but not your God.”

And I think you can already see the difficulties with these passages, both the ones we just read and the ones that will follow; because they propose that we assume a form of equanimity in relationship to grievance, sickness, and even death, and that we accept them as God’s will. 

Well, how many of us really do that? 

Do we come to an inner stillness that allows the world, which is God’s will in its entirety, to flow into us without interference? 

Do we form a deep spiritual relationship with that state? 

Is our sensation feminine and receptive enough to receive the world as it is rather than the way we wish it were? I say feminine because Eckhart always refers to the soul as female. 

And indeed, this question is not a matter of our own will and our attitude, but a question of the soul itself and what it is nourished by. And Eckhart proposes, as I think he ever and always does in his sermons, that the soul is best nourished by God’s will, as it is. If we come into alignment with that, this is the highest form of prayer we could achieve. 

Lee van Laer substack Inner Christianity, God’s will, June 6, 2026

So TYJ for all daily bread and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debts leave us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil amen 

Heating up

 

Back on the trail again

  God grant us mercy

doG

Dog park again, Ssturday

 Be in this day with us. I pray I am aware of your presence all day.  Give us courage to love this life boldly and harmoniously with each other. I need help with loviug and accepting my responsibility for others, starting with my loved ones. Be my help I pray. IJN

One to remember and ponder, Lee van Lear Substack, the Morning Five, 6/7/26 Spiritual Molecules:

Hi there, folks. This is Lee, and you’re watching In The Moment, a series of impromptu conversations about life, the Gurdjieff work, and everything else. 

And I’m going to try to wrap up a project that I undertook about, well, I don’t know, two or three months ago about molecular condensates. Boring subject for some of you, I’m sure, but perhaps we’ll find a way to make it a little more exciting today. I don’t know. But because the origins and beginnings of this project are lost in the mists of time and the foggy regions of an ancient brain, I’m going to refer to a couple of notes here just flesh out the beginning. 

Spiritual molecules. 

Well, what the hell are those? 

Well, actually, spiritual molecules, according to Gurdjieff, actually exist. And he talked about them in chapter nine of In Search of the Miraculous, where he indicated that when we breathe the air, we also breathe in particles that are invisible to our scientific instruments. I’m paraphrasing there, but that is what he said. 

And those particles are spiritual molecules, because they can’t be seen by instruments, except for the instrument of the human body, which is a most exquisite tool capable of sensing things, not just on physical, but also metaphysical or, as we might also call them, energetic levels. 

So, why am I bringing this up? 

Well, if you take a look at molecular condensates, biological communities function the same way that molecular condensates do, and spiritual communities function the same way biological communities do, because the material world we live in is a reflection of a spiritual world on a level above it. 

Okay, so our life, both inner and outer, is formed by energies. And alignment means sensing those energies, bringing them into relationships that are harmonically correspondent. That is to say, they make sense together. They produce a better, a more elevated vibration when they are aligned. 

Spiritual molecules do this the same way that molecules and molecular condensates do. They gather together to do work within being. And they gather together temporarily over and over again, even in the same way that it happens in the molecules in your cells. Every single second, they gather together and do work in new and different ways as they interact with one another. 

We call these spiritual molecules values. But the values are actually material things, just like atoms and molecules. When we damage them, they’re hard to repair. 

Human beings were always meant to be consciously aware of their values, but we’ve forgotten how to do that. The sense of the sacred is a sense of those values. The great religions were originally intended to help human beings align these values, but we’ve lost sight of that. 

Well, those are the notes I wrote mixed in with some various other comments. But I think that that captures the essence of it. 

I would like the community to understand that our spiritual molecules function the same way that the molecules in our biological bodies function, and that we need to work on helping them to become properly aligned for our spiritual health. It’s peculiar the way that things work [in a nearly identical way] on every level, and the whole point of embarking on this conversation about molecular condensates was leading towards this point about spiritual molecules. 

There are spiritual elements. 

They form spiritual molecules. 

The values in our life gather themselves together into more elaborate structures on a spiritual plane. 

They do this working in a metaphysical organ called the soul. 

And the soul is a living thing, just like our bodies are living things, which has a beginning, a birth, a lifespan, and a death that we know almost nothing about. 

There are arguments here on this level about whether the soul is ever born or has always been there, and whether it is immortal or not. And we can’t know those things in their true form, as we are here in these earthly bodies. 

But we can sense our spiritual values, our metaphysical elements. We can sense them because this instrument of the body is the tool that was designed and evolved to do that. And if we lose sight of the fact that we are creatures not just of molecular organic nature, but molecular spiritual nature—if we realize this, perhaps we’ll be a little more sensitive to just what kinds of nutrition and nourishment we take in, in terms of spiritual molecules, and how we bring it into relationship in this life. 

That’s what attention is for, is to help our spiritual molecules align with one another better. So that’s more or less it. 

I may have some more comments on this subject in the future, but I’d like to remind everyone of how absolutely material this whole question is in terms of being.